A couple of weeks ago, I went to lunch with the Director of Publications to discuss a piece I’m writing for the Wabash Magazine. I am not going to disclose any spoilers for that piece here—sorry. Anyway, Steve (because his name is Steve) asked me what I was doing for the summer after my internship in Hovey Cottage concludes. My last day in the office is Wednesday, after all. Anyway, I told him that my sister’s getting married on the morning of Saturday the thirteenth.
Steve’s response was an inexplicably deep question: “Is it a good thing?”
But it took me longer to process the question than to know what my answer was.
“Yes,” I said, “It’s a good thing.”
Now, to be up-front, this is my second go-round at writing this post. I wrote my first draft in March and I have since scrapped it because I came back to it last week and decided I didn’t like the wording or really anything about that first draft. So I decided to take this week to rewrite and to really think about what I wanted to say. So I promptly didn’t write anything for the past week.
Then Carolyn texted me a few days ago to say she was going to go get her dress. At that point, I decided I should probably write something to commemorate the occasion.
This is a lot more difficult than I thought it would be. It may not be accurate to say that Carolyn and I have been lifelong friends because she’s my sister. As kids, Carolyn and I knew what pushed each other’s buttons, and we pushed those buttons. Many of those pet-peeves are still bothersome to us to this day. Somewhere along the river of time, and I’m not sure when, Carolyn and I became best friends. We had some fun and had some great memories. I’ll never forget some of our conversations and inside jokes regarding movies. My favorites include “Buff,” the antagonist of Back to the Future, the theology of Toy Story, why Gnomio and Juliet just might be a little too much fun, the misunderstood antagonist of Hunchback of Notre Dame, why Frozen is not that good, and, most recently, the sexual maturity of a gorilla (we were watching Tarzan… don’t ask questions).
But outside of cinema and our general dislike of predictable movies (which she says Brandon still enjoys, much to my humor), Carolyn and I are also connoisseurs of music. When I was home for Independence Day, Carolyn was dog-sitting for Brandon and Co.’s dog, Sophie. One day, I went with her just for kicks. On the way back, REO Speedwagon’s “Can’t Fight This Feeling” came on the radio. So we made fun of it for the entirety of its airtime.
Carolyn and I share some good memories from childhood, so it’s still weird to me, even seven days away from her wedding that she’s getting married.
I know that she and Brandon were made for each other though. I have no doubt about that anymore. What I see in their bond transcends a “relationship.” Even calling it a bond seems like I’m selling it short because it’s still more than that.
I knew this was going to be a difficult, that’s why I wrote the first draft so long ago. And now I don’t even know what to say. Sometimes the lack of words speaks greater volumes than the most eloquent writing. I don’t think of myself as the best speaker, that’s the primary reason why I’m a writer. To me, my not knowing what to say/write means more than anything I can say. To try to put words to it would only dampen the significance of the momentous event next Saturday.
I know that Brandon is a great man and I know that Carolyn is a great woman. Knowing what I know now and seeing what I have seen, I have come to have a great amount of trust in my own intuition. And my intuition tells me that Carolyn and Brandon will make a great married couple.
It has been said that change is good and that change is necessary. But I know that the love shared between Carolyn and my very-soon-to-be brother-in-law will never fade.
And that’s a very good thing.
“There’s a rhyme and reason to the wild outdoors
When the heart of this star-crossed voyager beats in time with yours”
From The Lion King, the best Disney movie.
Also, not that funky remix from the soundtrack that screams 90’s.
Carolyn knows what I’m talking about.